How to Make Friends When Living Abroad

One of the scariest things for anyone, especially those post-university, is the thought of having to make new friends.

When you move to a new country, you have to accept that you are leaving behind all your friends and family to start over building your community and connections, not just the other elements of your life. The idea alone is enough to stop people even considering that they might move to a new country. This simple task we performed on a daily basis as a child suddenly seems so impossible to us as adults, but I am here to tell you it is not as difficult as we think.

Hiking in Rascafria, 2024

It is important to acknowledge in the making of new friends, that finding them is ultimately like dating, much the same as you might break up with a partner, you can break up with a friend. This is an idea we aren't really taught in society, it's all about BFFL (Best Friends For Life) but that concept in itself should be relegated to our childhood friends.

Friendship finding is also about mindset, you have to understand it is a task you set yourself to work on, you will need to do it as if you have something to accomplish to build your community otherwise it isn't going to happen. Likewise, you need to be in the headspace of putting yourself out there. You know you're going to need to be socialising and putting your best self forward to connect with people.

Here are some key tips and tricks for finding friends when you move to a new country and I promise they won't be as complex or confusing as you might think!

1. Get on the dating apps!

Now hear me out! I know this might seem like a ridiculous suggestion but Bumble BBF is actually great space to meet new like-minded men or women in your new home. Just like the standard dating app format but organised for meeting friends, it gives you the perfect opportunity to meet other international and local people also in the right mindset to branch out and meet new people.

2. Online Facebook Groups and Event Apps

There is a wealth of online groups on Facebook as well as applications such as Meet Up that will help you in attending events and spaces with a wide variety of people. Ultimately an easier space to make friends as you aren't in a 1-1 setting where the stakes might feel higher. The benefit of these is you can also look for events that are in line with your interests, my first event where I met my friends was hiking, which is already a pass time I enjoy.

3. Remember that your first friends aren't always your forever friends

The same can be said for when you join university, the first people you meet and spend time with aren't the people you might necessarily then hang out with for the rest of your life. The first friendships are always overwhelming and a bit over encompassing, we can be almost like a needy relationship wanting to make sure we spend a lot of time together to solidify the friendship even though it might not be the best one for us. Try to just accept the process and that friends will come and go, if these ones don't stick, there are more people to be met!

Retiro Madrid, 2021

4. Enjoy starting again!

This can't be said enough but consider the priveledge of the opportunity of going out and getting to meet a whole new set of people from different backgrounds, countries and walks of life. This is one of the beautiful benefits of living abroad! In your hometown, I can imagine as my own, almost everyone is from the same place or at least the same country but in your new home, there will be a huge variety of people around for you to get to know. You will be surprised who you end up connecting with the most!

5. Traditional dating

I put this at the end because while I do believe it is a good way to get to know people I really think we need to be careful with how we get our emotions involved when building our life from square one. A reoccuring story is of those who moved with a partner to their homecountry, and then they break up and have no circle of friendship or support built for themselves and the same can go for trying out dating as soon as you move! I would never tell people against this but it sits at the end of the recommendations as I would take it with a pinch of salt.

What other ways do you think we can make friends when we move to new countries? Or what are some important tips you would empart? Any friendship horror stories you could tell? I definitely have a few! Let me know and good luck! Eleanor x